Elegy to a Rented Clarinet

In January 2015, I started renting a clarinet and teaching myself to play. It was true love. Together, we made terrible squeaking noises (and some almost-music). I even played in public once, with reasonable success. My end goal was to join a swing band, and someday be totally rad. But, finances changed and something had to go — and, much as I didn’t want to admit it, for various reasons, it had to be the clarinet.

It took me a while to come to grips with this (I may or may not have cried over the decision). Returning the clarinet felt like the death of a bunch of awesome dreams. Like giving up, and losing a window of opportunity I was never going to get back.


But, Clarinet, life is not about having everything you want. Life is about loving Jesus. About humbly acknowledging your limitations. About being honest when you are trying to do too much.

I will always be your friend, Clarinet. When I hear you played well, I will definitely fangirl.

And someday — even if it has to be in the next life — we will meet again.


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